31 rants

I’m in my 30s, I have been since I turned 30 last November and now I’m 31. That means I’m not a fucking kid.

1. I have a fucking kid, if we plan a time for anything I expect you to stick to it.

2. You also have a fucking kid, why don’t you know in advance when you are or are not available?

3. You’ve a lot more money than I do, you can afford daycare or a nanny — not everyone can, get your head out of your ass.

4. I absolutely cannot stand people that have no concept of time.

5. Therefore, don’t waste my fucking time.

6. If there’s anything at all I learned in life is time, it’s more valuable than money.

7. I wasn’t there the time my mother passed, I could have spent more time with her but I didn’t. My job as a mall bitch was more important.

8. Yeah right, I never valued the mall as important. That’s why I did half the things I did there.

9. No I don’t want to be working at boring ass furniture store forever.

10. I’m looking for a new job for a reason that’s not everyone’s business.

11. Keep checking my Instagram stories, I don’t mention anything at all about you.

12. I’m a private person so again, no I’m not going to mention much about my life on social media.

13. Is that a job requirement? I don’t give a shit you’re not hiring me anyway.

14. Excuse me? You want me to leave my full time job for an interview?

15. Unless you want me to leave that job to work for you, it’s not happening.

16. You will work around my schedule as I have to dick around with yours.

17. Yeah, no my child comes first.

18. Part time? I’m an adult. Maybe a college student could survive on that.

19. Don’t talk to me like that. I’m not fucking stupid.

20. I’m fully aware of who is checking my instastories. So my advice is, if you’re stalking me be less obvious.

21. Not like it matters. I’m most likely leaving you in a month.

22. I also can’t stand slow people.

23. People that take forever to respond… take forever to get out of the way… take forever driving… or my order…

24. I’d love to knock the shit out of you but that’s illegal.

25. I love playing police at work because they’re too lazy to check cameras. Not.

26. And here I am doing everything again and they wonder why I’m ‘mad’.

27. Don’t complain about having to wear a mask to the store when you don’t work and have to wear it 40hrs a week.

28. Don’t complain about being broke if you haven’t worked a day in your life.

29. Don’t complain about having to wait for a ride if you won’t even bother getting your license.

30. Don’t complain about the president of you didn’t vote.

31. Most people don’t give a shit so you’re better off minding your business and plotting schemes to get ahead.

New Year

I’ve missed it
after I had extreme sweat
and felt like I was going to have
a heart attack
I’ve lost my sense of time
I fell sick and couldn’t breath
stayed up all not coughing
or waking up the few hours
I slept to pee numerous times
I didn’t call off of work
I didn’t have anyone to cover me
I didn’t see a doctor
I couldn’t do high intensity workouts
I didn’t need a doctor to tell me
but he called them and they told him
if I did it could kill me and the baby
I had to moderate my temperature
if I got another 101 degrees
I had to go to the hospital
I carried on like normal
and lost my voice
some cop pulled me over
for ‘following someone too close’
he let me go with a warning
it was obvious
I wasn’t lying
he could tell by
listening and seeing me
I’m sick and probably stupid
for going to work

I did anyway
I put in for some time to use
the rest of my vacation days
my priorities are changing
I see less the point
in fighting and going to things
that don’t matter
or won’t lead anywhere
all I can say is
enjoy what you have now
whether it be a person or thing
someday it won’t be there
eventually time does run out
but how are you going to spend it?

Thoughts on Fall

20 years ago…
All I can remember is being Wonder-Woman.

17 years ago…
A princess trick or treating.

16-10 years ago…
The same thing. Pretty trees, bipoloar weather, apples and pumpkins — and a bunch of vampire, witch, and fairy costumes. I loved my Goosebumps and Halloween movies/shows. It was not October if I didn’t watch Hocus Pocus or Halloween Town.

5 years ago…
Not a thing. It was boring.

3 years ago…
-I ended a bad relationship with my ex after I spilled his beer during a bonfire.
-I met my boyfriend. Our first date was walking in the park. It was cold and rainy. The trees were still beautiful. We made-out under a bridge — and in his van. Later he asked me to be his girlfriend. I said I had to think about it…

Warm/cold sunny or rainy weather. The trees changing colors. The smell in the air. The awesome movies, decorations, and food — and a time to fall in love, over and over again.

Question marks “???” texts

Everyone is blowing up my phone with questions marks this week it’s as if I have some obligation to return every message they send me, I don’t. I haven’t met/don’t know half of the people sending me these messages. They are people who are interested in me sending me questions about my day and life.. I don’t like being questioned by no one, especially by people I’m not interested in. I can’t straight out say, “Hey, I’m not interested lose my number.” I tried saying that earlier this week, it backfired. The person called me on my cell phone and sent me additional texts apologizing for bothering me. Yet, they continued to send me messages like ‘Hey’ and ‘What’s up?’ I didn’t answer any of those.

Then I feel bad because they’re wasting their time and I’m not interested in them the way they’re interested in me. I wish they would find someone else that wants to talk to them. I figured if I didn’t respond to any messages, they would get the message. Like ‘I don’t feel like talking right now’ or ‘I’m not interested’. Then I feel like I have some other obligation to explain to them why I don’t want to talk and why I’m not interested. I shouldn’t have to feel obligated, it’s not right.

For one, I don’t even know most of these people. Another thing, there is no rule that I have to be glued to my phone and answer every person that messages me. I only have to speak to people who are actually in my life. If your not, well send someone else question marks…