Year of 2020

Publish a few things
no one reads
shutdown everything
for almost 6 months
laid off
make everyone wear
masks and ‘social distance’
start new job
be forced to sanitize
until my hands are dry
get a new car
hardly leaves the house
besides kickboxing and work
father gets struck and killed
by a car
get covid from in-law
watch my husband whine
and not take care of the kid
have a hard time getting
back to work
because they don’t understand
you can test positive up
to 3 months
meanwhile everyone else can
get back to a story no one
will probably read
look for a new job
them expecting I can do
a virtual interview with
a baby in the background

My year has been great
the painting of my mother’s
obituary picture holding
my daughter
I received on Christmas
was the cherry on top
as if I need to be
reminded of shit
this year has done it
I quit

You know what kills people too?
Cars and cancer
but no one is talking about it
this year
yes, people are dying
that is real
I had a mild case of covid
a little cough and stuffy nose
and I survived
if I was older, who knows

Boss concerns

The place is trashed
So there’s several other employees, tell them not to be slobs.

No one is sanitizing shit
So it shouldn’t have been my sole responsibility to do all of it. Whose to say I didn’t catch it from work?

Who will do your job?
No one who cares let shit fly everywhere. No different than what you people do on the weekends.

It’s been almost 3 weeks
Nothing has been done. Again, not my problem. Contact the state and county. They put a one year in almost one month quarantine (and no I don’t extended pay).

Are you still positive?
Listen. You can be positive for up to 3 months it doesn’t mean you’re infectious. You stop being infectious after 10 days or 72 hours your symptoms go away. Don’t believe me? Contact the CDC.

Did you get another test?
I can however, but like I said it doesn’t mean it’ll be negative. And guess what? I can return to work with a doctors note if it isn’t. My husband is. You don’t like it? Pay me to stay for weeks or months until I get another job.

What are you saying?
You all are afraid of a virus you know nothing about. Hell, we don’t even know if what they say is true. But I still live in America and I’m not required to do shit. Especially if it’s not written in a law.

How are you doing? When are you returning?
I’m good. I’m healthy. I’m hoping never. This entire time you’ve been hounding me about my test and other people in my household to get tested. Yeah, no I’m not testing my one year old. There’s no law stating I have too upon returning and I shouldn’t. It’s apparent you people only care that you have to get off your ass and do something. I’ve done everything and I was forced out because other people.

Reminds me why I’m socially distant from the start.

Alright

I see how it is
curiosity killed the cat
that’s okay I probably
wouldn’t have taken it
I’m probably going
somewhere else in 2021

You know
you don’t know someone
based on their cover
you’re lucky to have
parents alive
I don’t
guess what?
It’s a reality you’ll
have to face someday
I just faced it sooner

I’m not an alien
I’m ahead of all
of you

Pandemic?
Guess what?
I wear a mask
everywhere
wash my hands
sanitize
and I still got
COVID!
I only visit
stores twice a month
maybe
and never eat out!

Why?
Well someone was
sick and selfish
put him seeing my
daughter over
everyone’s welfare

Older people care?
Please, they’re just
as ignorant!

So I’m supposed
to sit here and watch
you idiots?
Nope

You can either
live in fear
or accept reality

‘I’ve COVID’ response

If I get sick it’s you and your husbands fault!
How dare you come if you knew he was sick!?

First off, it was my husbands father that got sick and felt symptoms but had to be around us. Second, I didn’t know shit about him feeling sick until he said he was getting tested.

How careless are you?
Hey, fucking idiot. I have an infant. I follow all precautions. I don’t want her to get sick. You know she got sick too because of this shit!

How are you feeling?
I’m okay. My daughter is. My husband acts like he’s dying. I’m sick of it. If I’m tired I can’t sleep I’m the full time babysitter.

Who did you infect?
Contact tracing called me. I haven’t been remotely close to anyone. It’s not my fault one member in the household is reckless. Makes me wonder if I ever want them to watch my daughter.

31 rants

I’m in my 30s, I have been since I turned 30 last November and now I’m 31. That means I’m not a fucking kid.

1. I have a fucking kid, if we plan a time for anything I expect you to stick to it.

2. You also have a fucking kid, why don’t you know in advance when you are or are not available?

3. You’ve a lot more money than I do, you can afford daycare or a nanny — not everyone can, get your head out of your ass.

4. I absolutely cannot stand people that have no concept of time.

5. Therefore, don’t waste my fucking time.

6. If there’s anything at all I learned in life is time, it’s more valuable than money.

7. I wasn’t there the time my mother passed, I could have spent more time with her but I didn’t. My job as a mall bitch was more important.

8. Yeah right, I never valued the mall as important. That’s why I did half the things I did there.

9. No I don’t want to be working at boring ass furniture store forever.

10. I’m looking for a new job for a reason that’s not everyone’s business.

11. Keep checking my Instagram stories, I don’t mention anything at all about you.

12. I’m a private person so again, no I’m not going to mention much about my life on social media.

13. Is that a job requirement? I don’t give a shit you’re not hiring me anyway.

14. Excuse me? You want me to leave my full time job for an interview?

15. Unless you want me to leave that job to work for you, it’s not happening.

16. You will work around my schedule as I have to dick around with yours.

17. Yeah, no my child comes first.

18. Part time? I’m an adult. Maybe a college student could survive on that.

19. Don’t talk to me like that. I’m not fucking stupid.

20. I’m fully aware of who is checking my instastories. So my advice is, if you’re stalking me be less obvious.

21. Not like it matters. I’m most likely leaving you in a month.

22. I also can’t stand slow people.

23. People that take forever to respond… take forever to get out of the way… take forever driving… or my order…

24. I’d love to knock the shit out of you but that’s illegal.

25. I love playing police at work because they’re too lazy to check cameras. Not.

26. And here I am doing everything again and they wonder why I’m ‘mad’.

27. Don’t complain about having to wear a mask to the store when you don’t work and have to wear it 40hrs a week.

28. Don’t complain about being broke if you haven’t worked a day in your life.

29. Don’t complain about having to wait for a ride if you won’t even bother getting your license.

30. Don’t complain about the president of you didn’t vote.

31. Most people don’t give a shit so you’re better off minding your business and plotting schemes to get ahead.

What about Scorpio

We are the sign of transformation. People often overlook it or think we’re the sign of sex. Everyone enjoys sex, it’s not only a Scorpio thing!

Evolved Scorpio adapts better than most people and has the ability to transform lives around them. Whether or not they do, depends on who they are or circumstances. It’s not one sign fits all. That’s why less evolved Scorpios or those going through a rough time are more manipulative or secretive than others.

But we are a mystery, it doesn’t mean we’re necessarily hiding anything. It means we aren’t an open book. We’re not going on stage and talking about our personal lives. I mean, unless we’re comedians making jokes about it. We have a good sense of humor. You can hardly offend us unless you make assumptions. We hate assumptions or people that are closed-minded.

You wanna piss us off? Question anything about us. Terrible idea to piss us off actually. It’s like Scorpio has a protective magic shield called karma. You would think they casted a spell on you, no. You think they’re stupid? They know how the universe works.

Scorpio doesn’t give two shits about being popular or liked. Especially when they were in school. They enjoyed not having people hover over them and that they can be themselves with no judgement. Though sure, people probably did. They didn’t care. Life has given them thick skin.

So no, we’re not buying anyone’s bullshit. You’re better off convincing the more naive signs.

‘Sexual harassment’ at work

Mandatory meeting, they said.
Why, nobody is getting harassed?
That I know or care to know of.
I know someone called the owner a narcissist and you only do well if
you’re a “yes man”.

I can somewhat see how that’s true
counting the few comments in the passing
or just this weird vibe he gives off
he asked me to be in a commercial
with him, why? I’m not being a
narcissistic but we all know
I’m the most attractive female here
because I’m ‘young’
so why not try to make yourself
look good? I declined
I don’t give a fuck about
‘gaining popularity’
last thing I want is people
coming here and thinking I sell shit
I don’t
it’s bad enough everyone refuses
to ‘do their part’ and disinfectant
the store, nope I was called upon
to do it along with everything else

I’m off subject
only comment someone has made to me
is “damn” and looked at my ass
he’s ‘special needs’ and has
no idea when he’s being inappropriate
is that an excuse, no?

I almost gaged at the part
‘don’t have sexual relationships at work, have them outside if you’re both consenting it’s not harassment’
why? Gee, perhaps I had sexual
relationships with men at a job
not here, the men are all boring
or too old
one of the few times I take pride
nobody has a clue about
my past or who I am
thank god

“We’re essential,”

he said. Why? Because they now sell appliances? You know, back in the old days people had to wash everything by hand. Essential? My ass. Like the owner will do anything to stay in business. You can bet your ass I’m going to report him if I’m pushed to work if another shutdown happens. Not because I’m lazy. I have a one year old daughter. I don’t want to be out in this shit. Hell, I order everything online. A privilege I know, I’m sorry Amazon workers. You also shouldn’t be out in this shit.

My husband works at a car dealership as a manager of some sort. He’d be sent home. Why? Cars aren’t essential either. You’re sent home by the government, where the hell do you need to go? Exactly. In old times people also took buses, taxis, or farther more horses to get places. Cars are also a luxury.

So if there’s anything you learn at all what is necessary, think of the shit you have and don’t necessarily need. I bet somewhere one of your ancestors is laughing and rolling their eyes at you.

31 drunk thoughts

1. Halloween is on 31 and I’m going to be 31 in a week. Fuck.
2. I’m feeling weird like the first time I was pregnant. No, I don’t have coronavirus bitch.
3. What is this?
4. I had a drink where did it go?
5. Maybe I shouldn’t be drinking if I think I’m pregnant. I don’t seriously think I am. Do I?
6. I’d love to smash some pumpkins.
7. Monday I’m not going in.
8. Bitches would take me back part time.
That’s funny, you know I left?
9. Ironic, because he was trying to sleep with me too.
10. I haven’t ever heard back from them so I don’t know why they’re stalking my feed.
11. Thinking about hiring me? No. Do I look like I was born yesterday.
12. Hmmm maybe I should no.
13. There’s something in my nose.
14. I’m going to be out in about 20 mins.
15. Yeah, I’m waking up with a headache.
16. What is that noise?
17. It’s the sound of me dying again.
18. Maybe I should.
19. No.
20. No.
21. Fuck it. Why the fuck do I care? I don’t.
22. Yes.
23. No.
24. I’m bored.
25. I need to forget everything.
26. This is the wrong stuff.
27. The fuck, sometimes I get so mad and wonder why I stopped smoking weed.
28. Maybe that’s my problem.
29. Who cares.
30. I don’t because I’ve no idea when I’m going to be drug tested.
31. Whose creeping now?

So intriguing

I am, you watch me
do what? Post pictures and videos
of my daughter haha
like millions of other people

Why is that?
I don’t know
I don’t have the
slightest clue who
you are
don’t matter

it’s not like I’m
going to provide
my life story
and personal business
on my feed
that’s why I have novels
I hardly mention
among other things
I’m not a millennial
that enjoys ‘self-promoting’
I also never say where I work
why? I fucking hate it
and don’t want anyone showing up

So my daughter is cute
I’m a mother
should have followed me
years ago when I wasn’t
in this life
maybe I would have been
more fascinating
and less likely to swollen
my pride
haha, yeah right
I was never an open book
that’s what made me a ‘writer’