‘Pick a topic’

What? I feel like I’ve written everything and now you expect me to focus on one thing. Haha. Yeah right.

What is going on now? Nothing. What about politics and protests? Do I look like a protester myself? I’m not. God damn. Do you really need another person to tell you how fucked up everything is? You don’t.

My old friend said I’m boring now because I have a kid. Yeah, I am. I also can’t help there’s nothing to do. Some people only find you interesting when you’re fucking around. Why? That’s when you have stories.

Oh, I can write what’s going on in my mind. I don’t even think it’s my business what I’m thinking. It’s a recipe for disaster. I’m sure you’ve seen some of my writing, you really wanna know what else goes on in my head? Haha.

I used to be angry

before him
I didn’t know why
repressed emotions
from her death
and some other things
I kept well hidden

I said I’m not angry
anymore
he said bullshit
there’s a reason why
I’m ‘beating the crap
out of everything’
maybe he was right
the only expression
on my face was anger

Now it is blank
cold stone
I might as well be a robot
I think but I don’t feel
I loved again
it was gone
against my will
and wrong

I’m back to nothingness
like I was when
my mother passed
they exist
only in my dreams now