doesn’t define us
but helps us better
understand the present
said or did a lot
of shit they shouldn’t
have been doing
they shouldn’t be hung
for it but at the same
time, they need to be
accountable and should
have taken into
hey, this might bite
me in the ass someday
and make me lose things
I’ve worked hard for
that’s why your mother
told you to
“think before you speak”
“But I was…”
the world is done
with your excuses
look at everything
going on in the world
nobody gives a fuck
about ‘oh, poor you’
especially when you’re
an adult and have all
while a lot of us
are actually struggling
It’s time to wake up
nobody cares to listen
to your narcissistic bullshit
so go back to flaunting
what you have
and posting pictures
see how many people
(you won’t know)
or unfollow your ass
I don’t feel anything. I’m emotionally numb and retarded. The only emotions I know are lust, desire, passion, and anger. I only feel lust, desire, and passion in bed. After I do it there’s nothing there. I’m empty. Someone pisses me off, I turn in 2 seconds to a raging asshole. Do I yell? Not unless I’m married to you. Strangers, acquittances, and co-workers I can forget about just as fast as they pissed me off. But if, I don’t I have some history, relationship, or interest in you — it’s different. I stay mad longer. Sometimes I don’t realize I’m mad until I’m alone in my head. Do anything about it? I try. But sometimes, the physical and creative work I do isn’t enough. So I get drunk and high a bit. It does nothing but get me out of myself. Do I have a problem? No. I don’t think drinking a few times a month or smoking weed once a blue moon means you have a problem. It’s a problem when you use them as a crutch. I don’t. I wish I could but that’s not me. I have a daughter now. I would never put her or myself in that position. I don’t even do those things when she’s around. I don’t judge people but they judge me. I don’t care enough about people in general to care what they’re doing.
Because I’m turning 30…
1. Your boyfriend flirted with me.
2. Your boyfriend kissed me — he’s a bad kisser, don’t worry I don’t want to sleep with him!
3. Slept with someone’s boyfriend, not intentionally of course.
4. When in Rome…
5. If I have to think about my feelings for you, they’re non-existent.
6. Hooked up with an ex(s) once, twice, or thousand times because the sex was good.
7. Don’t have any/many friends.
8. Like to be alone, value solitude, and don’t need people to be happy.
9. If I’m in a relationship with you and don’t want to have sex with you; you can be sure you’re either turning me off or I’m sleeping with someone else.
10. Depending on who you are, I probably won’t give you an honest answer how many people I slept with.
11. I do pick and choose.
12. I don’t find people fascinating.
13. Ideas are more interesting.
14. If you want to seduce me, don’t bother. I either want you or I don’t.
15. Should I think about an ex? It’s only because they were good in bed and I’m bored with you.
16. I go to the gym for my sanity, not because I’m trying to lose weight or reach some goal.
17. I don’t believe in one soulmate, we have many.
18. These days I spend more time fantasizing about doing crazy shit to my hair.
19. I was a terrible student.
20. Yeah, teachers and peers didn’t get me. I lived in my own world and didn’t care.
21. I developed thick skin early in life.
22. Sometimes I could be angry and not know why.
23. I assume most people don’t like me and I’m okay with that, I don’t like most people.
24. I can be secretive but trust me, I’m brutally honest too.
25. I’m probably hiding some past things from my partner.
26. I probably hide my money too.
27. There is but one person I truly trust in this world, myself.
28. Should I check someone out? Hardly ever. They’d have to have nice arms or eyes to get my attention.
29. I don’t believe in marriage.
30. Now I understand. The only person I’ll truly love in this world is my daughter.