Here we go again

Who are you? Honey, you don’t want to know me. All you need to know is I’m married woman with a backwards path. 

What did you do? What didn’t I do?

Have you changed? I believe people’s circumstances and seasons in life change but they stay the same, so no I’m still me. 

What does that mean? I’m a free spirit around circles and squares. 

Okay, what are you doing here? What does it look like? I don’t care. 

You’re a writer and kickboxer, huh? Don’t worry, you’ll never find my titles because you don’t know my maiden name. Yeah and you should probably stand clear, I’m physically and mentally crazy. 

What you, blah blah I’m going to pace shit together because I don’t know what to say to you. You obviously want to sleep with me? Are you jacked or have nice arms? That’s my weakness. Hmmmm. No, these days I try to remove myself from those situations because I know how I am. So yes, you’re right I would but I’m not.

Not my mother


my mother was given away 

I wasn’t 

she wouldn’t do that

to her children 

she grew up in the city

I grew up in a small town

she was on her own

when she was 15 

I lived with her until I was 27

for reasons outside

 of her having cancer 

she get off on her own

because she had no choice 

I did

not so sure what happened 

in her life before me or when

I was little but she had six kids

myself included and always worked

I have what one? I didn’t get 

even have sex in

high school because of her

my daughter came almost 

two years after her death

I know before she diagnosed 

she was always angry

I can’t say I am but I’m quick

to get pissed but I don’t stay 

that way (you wonder why

I’ve a short fuse, there you go

it is genetic)

she’d be mad and complain

about her boyfriend for hours

 so I guess we knew the truth 

of men early on but not so much

anything about her past really

who tells their kids the men 

they fucked or cheated on?

I wouldn’t but my daughter,

not talking about it isn’t

going to help you not 

make the same mistakes

No mother I don’t see you

as a cheat, I heard the phone calls

even if you were decades ago

it wouldn’t matter 

don’t turn in your grave 

I wouldn’t but yes, some secrets

people will never know about me

I can say,

the final months to the last moment 

I saw my mother

she wasn’t as angry

it’s like she knew

none of it mattered 

she said she did her job

she raised six kids

and it was my turn?

like I’d have that many 

I wouldn’t but

she was peaceful and falling

asleep the last time I saw her

unlike my father I saw video footage 

of him getting struck and killed 

by a car 

so your final moment

will say a lot about how 

you lived your life 

‘Front end’

“Thank you for calling…”

Don’t fucking call me. 

“Please… blah blah thank you”

It hurts my soul to be fake nice to people. 

“Will you take a note for me?”

Get fucking voicemail like everyone else. I’m not a call girl. You think the only thing I do is take calls? Wrong. 

“You tell him I called.”

Yeah, I literally can’t leave my desk. I’m busy, he’s busy, and I’m not calling him. 

“Tell him I’ll be there in five minutes.”

I’ll get right on it. Dumb bitch. 

“May I speak to the manager?”

No, here’s his voicemail. He doesn’t want to talk to anyone. 

“Do you have a Facebook?”

Nope.  

“What about your parents?”

They’re dead. 

“I’m so sorry.”

I don’t need a pity party or your ill attempts at small talk. Next. 

“I like your voice”

he said

I think it’s a lie

everyone should be

sick of me  

I’m sick of listening 

to myself

that’s what I do 

besides deal with people 

petty shit no one 

can be bothered with

all shit I hate 

I don’t know

how I ended up here 

beats cleaning and I 

get paid to 

‘work on my novels’

nobody knows

I stay in my lane

even if I thought 

something was attractive 

about him I sure as hell

wouldn’t say anything

unless we

exchanged numbers 

haha 

not happening 

been there done that 


you should hear my

true voice

yeah, when I’m yelling

at my husband or kid

or the fucking douchebag

driving

His voice

sounds familiar 

not quite like his was 

but too inviting 

I know he’s trying 

to be nice or professional 

yet the way he looks

at me says otherwise 

attraction maybe 

on whose or what end

I’ve hardly had a look

at his face 

he’s tan and has nice arms 

shit

I’m not doing that again 

though desks and empty 

places were fun 

How to be a ‘psychic reader’

Big secret, I was a ‘psychic reader’ on a foreign website back in the day. Let me tell you, it takes zero experience or knowledge. Although, I mean my longstanding knowledge of the zodiac and New Age practices got me in the first place. (I was basically raised to be? My mother had the books and taught me some things.)

Anyway, it does require you to have the ability to answer a question. Not a simple yes or no, often the answer about their problem or ‘future’ is in the question. So it is necessary to have a STRONG UNDERSTANDING OF HUMAN NATURE. 

Don’t get it? I’ll show you…

“Are we going to have a relationship? He’s an Aries, I’m a Pisces.”

GOING TO? So, you’re implying that you don’t already. My answer is NO. Oh hun, an Aries would have no issues making things official with you — if you were headed that way. You’re too nice.

“When will I get married?”

The fact you’re asking me that tells me either you’re single, desperately want to tie the knot, or bored in life and looking for answers. You WILL get married WHEN you stop looking. 

“Are we soulmates? I’m a Gemini, he’s a Leo.”

Interesting signs. Guess what? It doesn’t tell me shit besides you believe sun signs can predict if you’re soulmates. If they do exist, my answer is NO. You wouldn’t be asking me if you were. You’d be confident in your relationship. 

Stories type app games rant

It’s our escape from all the shit online in and real life. Why the hell do we need to buy gems or passes for choices? For a stupid outfit or hair, really? And all the featured stories are lame or boring. Then we read COMMUNITY stories written by different people instead and we’re expected to PAY gems every TWO chapters. It wasn’t like that before. If you’re trying to rank stories try having a stars or thumbs up option. And the authors gets gems or money for every positive hit. It’s ridiculous. What was a fun game is no more. No wonder why you’re losing people.

Honest Article

Here’s pictures of random shit anyone can find on the internet: ____

I got this idea by staring at my ceiling. Really. I have two dream catchers hanging in my room.

I going to word vomit the obvious because you’re talking about paying me for my work.

I don’t know nothing more about this topic. I would love to leave you some pictures and links and you can look at it yourself. Who reads literary magazines anyway?

I don’t but I’m thinking about creating one. Haha. I’m a dumbass but I love being in control – of my fucking life and work. It’s no wonder I left my last job. I’m not a ‘yes man’.

I’m probably not going to be your intern either. More like, I’ll be looking for interns in the future if I expand. I have my own website. Why do I need to write shit on some man’s website? Because he MIGHT pay me. Haha. Next.

Year of 2020

Publish a few things
no one reads
shutdown everything
for almost 6 months
laid off
make everyone wear
masks and ‘social distance’
start new job
be forced to sanitize
until my hands are dry
get a new car
hardly leaves the house
besides kickboxing and work
father gets struck and killed
by a car
get covid from in-law
watch my husband whine
and not take care of the kid
have a hard time getting
back to work
because they don’t understand
you can test positive up
to 3 months
meanwhile everyone else can
get back to a story no one
will probably read
look for a new job
them expecting I can do
a virtual interview with
a baby in the background

My year has been great
the painting of my mother’s
obituary picture holding
my daughter
I received on Christmas
was the cherry on top
as if I need to be
reminded of shit
this year has done it
I quit

You know what kills people too?
Cars and cancer
but no one is talking about it
this year
yes, people are dying
that is real
I had a mild case of covid
a little cough and stuffy nose
and I survived
if I was older, who knows

Boss concerns

The place is trashed
So there’s several other employees, tell them not to be slobs.

No one is sanitizing shit
So it shouldn’t have been my sole responsibility to do all of it. Whose to say I didn’t catch it from work?

Who will do your job?
No one who cares let shit fly everywhere. No different than what you people do on the weekends.

It’s been almost 3 weeks
Nothing has been done. Again, not my problem. Contact the state and county. They put a one year in almost one month quarantine (and no I don’t extended pay).

Are you still positive?
Listen. You can be positive for up to 3 months it doesn’t mean you’re infectious. You stop being infectious after 10 days or 72 hours your symptoms go away. Don’t believe me? Contact the CDC.

Did you get another test?
I can however, but like I said it doesn’t mean it’ll be negative. And guess what? I can return to work with a doctors note if it isn’t. My husband is. You don’t like it? Pay me to stay for weeks or months until I get another job.

What are you saying?
You all are afraid of a virus you know nothing about. Hell, we don’t even know if what they say is true. But I still live in America and I’m not required to do shit. Especially if it’s not written in a law.

How are you doing? When are you returning?
I’m good. I’m healthy. I’m hoping never. This entire time you’ve been hounding me about my test and other people in my household to get tested. Yeah, no I’m not testing my one year old. There’s no law stating I have too upon returning and I shouldn’t. It’s apparent you people only care that you have to get off your ass and do something. I’ve done everything and I was forced out because other people.

Reminds me why I’m socially distant from the start.