Working at a dying mall on Black Friday

… Or any Saturday in the year.

1. I work for THE MALL, not a company or a store.
2. It’s just as busy as a Saturday when there is an event going on — lots of foot traffic, not a lot of messes or spending going on.
3. But the tenants are equally annoying and expect you to drop everything to sweep up some dirt.
4. Yes, I work here — no I’m not walking around with a broom for my health!
5. No we’re not hiring! Unless you’re maintenance, we apparently like to hire idiot men that do nothing but sit back here all day. Don’t send a resume, you have to be related to/friends with someone that works here to get a job!
6. I don’t want to pick up your wrappers because you’re too LAZY to walk 2 inches to throw it in the trash!
7. Realize NOTHING here is on sale! They had the same 10% off for MONTHS!
8. That store hasn’t been here in over a decade.
9. No I don’t know nor care what each store sells.
10. No I don’t know where the store that left 5 months ago went nor care!
11. I don’t keep tabs on shit.
12. Someone broke into your car? What do you want me to do? I’m not security. Security is just as useless. Call the cops on your cell phone.

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