“Hey, want to have a threesome?”
No, but is your friend single?

“We should hookup sometime.”
Maybe if we were at a bar but we are not…

“Do you spit or swallow?”
Neither.

“Are you a Lesbian? If you are, can I watch?”
Are you gay? If you are, can I watch? Just kidding. Why on Earth would I want to watch anyone have sex.

“Send me nude pics.”
Of what? I can send you pictures of a dog, cat, cow, or chicken. They’re naked…

“I want you, do you want me? I’m way better for you.”
What?